Table of Contents

THE NURTURING FAMILY

Responding in Moderation:

Rules and Boundaries:

Discipline:

Expectations for Children:

Development:

The Learning Process:

Assessing Your Relationship:

Assessing Your Child's Adjustment:

Is your child;

Two: Your Growing Child

TOUCHING AND PHYSICAL CONTACT:

TOILET TRAINING:

LANGUAGE DEVELOPMENT:

SPEECH PROBLEMS:

EATING AND TABLE MANNERS:

ADOLESCENTS:

TABLE MANNERS:

EATING TOO FAST OR TOO SLOWLY:

LEARNING ABOUT BOUNDARIES AND LIMITS:

HOW TO GET YOUR CHILD TO STAY IN BED:

HELPING AROUND THE HOUSE:

THE EXPANDING WORLD OF EXPERIENCES AND ACTIVITIES:

LEARNING ABOUT RESPONSIBILITIES:

PHYSICAL SKILLS:

ROLLER SKATES AND BICYCLES:

FIGHTING AND FENDING FOR ONESELF:

TALKING BACK:

Three: Your Emotional Child

CHILDREN AND FEAR:

FEAR OF THUNDER, SNAKES, AND SPIDERS:

NIGHTMARES:

ANGER AND TEMPER TANTRUMS:

POUTING AND WITHDRAWAL:

EXCITEMENT AND HAVING FUN:

BEING BORED:

DISAPPOINTMENT AND LOSS:

LOVE AND HATE:

HATE:

Four: Your Moral Child

STEALING:

LYING:

LEARNING ABOUT RELIGION:

LEARNED VALUES VERSUS EXPERIENCED VALUES:

CUSTOMARY VALUES VERSUS MORAL VALUES:

MEMORIZED VALUES VERSUS SELF-COMPUTED VALUES:

RESOLVING VALUE-CONFLICTED SITUATIONS:

Five: Your Social Child

FAMILY AND FRIENDS:

FRIENDS AND PLAYMATES:

GOING TO SCHOOL:

GETTING ALONG WITH TEACHERS AND SCHOOLMATES:

STAYING AT SCHOOL:

GROUPS AND COOPERATIVE ACTIVITIES:

CLUBS AND CLUBHOUSES:

HIGH SCHOOL AND HANGING OUT:

TEENAGERS AND CARS:

EXTRACURRICULAR AND OTHER ACTIVITIES:

TEENAGERS AND DATING:

OTHER FRIENDSHIPS:

Six: Your Thinking Child

LEARNING BY OBSERVING:

LEARNING THROUGH IMITATION:

LEARNING THROUGH TRIAL AND ERROR:

LEARNING ABOUT THINGS AND RELATIONSHIPS:

LEARNING ABOUT PEOPLE AND SITUATIONS:

SANTA CLAUS AND THE TOOTH FAIRY:

SUCCEEDING ACADEMICALLY:

PIANO LESSONS AND OTHER EXTRACURRICULAR INSTRUCTION:

RIGHTS AND RESPONSIBILITIES:

LEARNING TO THINK INDEPENDENTLY:

Seven: Your Child And Stress

Signs of stress:

Restlessness and trouble calming down:

Trouble concentrating and paying attention:

Trouble going to sleep or awakening during the night:

Bad dreams and nightmares:

Headaches:

Trouble with an upset stomach:

Cries easily or has crying spells:

Loses his temper easily and quickly:

Eight: Your Child And Depression

Signs of depression:

Not getting up-and-over the loss of an important relationship:

Not getting over a serious loss or disappointment:

Thinks he cannot do anything about what happens to him:

Talks about suicide:

Suicide attempts:

Nine: Your Child And School Adjustment Problems

The dimensions of learning:

Signs of learning and school difficulty

Trouble making good choices and decisions:

Problems expressing his thoughts and ideas:

Trouble doing things most children his age do easily:

Difficulty understanding school assignments and what teachers expect:

Trouble understanding what he reads:

Confused about what he is doing, what people expect or what people are saying:

Trying harder does not lead to his homework and other assignments getting better and easier:

Does some assignments very well and others very badly:

Forgets to do homework or has trouble remembering what was assigned:

Difficulty following instructions and directions:

Problems paying attention to time or managing time:

Gets bad grades:

Trouble asking for help or letting anyone help:

Difficulty accepting or dealing with criticism:

Always has excuses for not doing well:

Thinks his not doing well is someone else's fault:

Has to have an adult standing over him to get him to do his school work:

Feels teachers and other adults at school have it in for him:

Disrupts the classroom or the activities of other children:

Makes no effort to cooperate and get along:

Skips school or misses school a lot:

Ten: Your Child And Behavior Problems

Signs of serious behavior problems:

Pouts and becomes very difficult to live with:

Becomes nasty and hateful:

Gets extremely angry when things do not go his way:

Screams and yells at people:

Breaks and damages things:

Intentionally hits and hurts people (or animals):

Starts and gets into fights:

Bullies and picks on others:

Treats people cruelly:

Refuses to follow the rules or behave like you or other adults expect:

Refuses to accept the authority of parents, teachers, or others in charge:

Often behaves in socially inappropriate ways:

Uses illegal drugs:

Has friends who often get into trouble:

Has a reputation for not being someone others can depend on or trust:

Does not care if he upsets or hurts people:

Gets into trouble with the police or courts:

Eleven: Your Child And Relationship Problems

Signs of relationship problems:

Tries to keep his friends all to himself:

Often gets his feelings hurt:

Often becomes the brunt of teasing and put-downs:

Gets up-tight and nervous when anyone is angry or upset:

Refuses to stick up for himself:

Tries to please everyone and keep everyone happy:

Feels like most people do not like him:

Is rejected or ignored by most people his age:

Worries and frets about not doing things well enough and about failing:

Resists starting things because he is afraid they will turn out badly anyway:

Gives up too quickly and too easily:

Persistently feels very unhappy about his physical and sexual development:

Dislikes himself or puts himself down:

Feels he does not fit in or belong anywhere:

Thinks no one loves him:

Feels unlovable:

Losing interest in most people and activities:

Trouble making and keeping friends:

Avoids people and social activities:

Only likes activities he can do alone:

Refuses to talk to anyone about his feelings and thoughts:

Twelve: Your Child And Mental Illness

Signs of mental illness:

Mood jumps from one extreme to the other and he cannot control it:

Vomits after eating or uses laxatives to control his weight:

Goes on extreme eating binges:

Starves himself:

Mistrusts everyone and thinks people are out to get him:

Very strange thoughts and feelings he cannot understand or control:

Extreme fears that keep him from doing things most children his age do easily:

Trouble having people close or touching him:

Urinates or defecates in his clothes:

Cuts and hurts himself on purpose:

A persistent interest in fire, watching fires, setting fires, and doing things with fire:

Hears voices and sees things others do not hear and cannot see:

Addendum: Your Child And Common Medical Concerns